Experienced primarily (but not exclusively) by women, imposter syndrome is a manifestation of low self-esteem.
Eager for approval, children of critical parents or well-meaning, but pushy or high-achieving ones, strive to prove their worth. Sadly, the 'evidence' of their success or efforts fails to satisfy the adult child who expects to be
rumbled as a fraud. Successful women frequently study for more or more qualifications or work longer and harder than those who don't suffer from this anxiety-inducing syndrome, all to no avail. As someone who used to struggle with imposter syndrome despite my achievements, I understand this issue well, but thankfully, I know some pretty cool strategies for shutting the self-talk up!
If imposter syndrome has haunted you, held you back, or driven you to work harder than others, please give me a call. I'd love to work with you to silence that 'not good enough' narrative so that you can recognise your talents, trust your ability and live a happier, more confident life!
No matter how long you feel you've had it, low self-esteem isn't something you're born with. It usually develops over time perhaps through subtle or overt criticism by a parent, sibling, teacher, or partner. If you've experienced neglect, bullying, a lack of encouragement or praise, your confidence and self-belief will have been impacted, no question. The first step to feeling better about yourself is to recognise that beliefs are not facts; beliefs are opinions and so can be changed. I can't change your history, but I can help you to feel differently about it, and to feel differently about yourself.
If you want to experience a shift in your outlook or sense of self-worth, give me a call. I'll help you to overwrite the negative internal dialogue, so you can live your life with optimism and enthusiasm.
If you put the needs of friends, family, or colleagues before yours but feel like you're being exploited or taken advantage of, you are not alone. Many people tolerate toxic friendships or bossy colleagues or siblings because they don't know how to express their needs or assert themselves. This can lead to them feeling unimportant and resentful.
I help clients to communicate assertively and effectively so that they can break old patterns and enjoy new confidence and respect.
Most of us like to feel in control most of the time, but if you have a phobia or exaggerated fear, there'll probably be times when you just react and even risk harm to get away from the thing that freaks you out. This could be a living creature, an inanimate object, an environmental thing such as water or heights, or almost anything else. If it were rational, rather than automatic, you'd just explain to yourself that you're safe, and whoopy doo, happy days. But the subconscious doesn't work like that and if it has 'stored' a message that this 'thing' is unsafe it will try to protect you by having you get the hell away from it. The good news is that I know how these maladaptive strategies work and I know how to change the internal message. In fact, I know lots of different ways!
Many people are happy to live with a phobia, especially if it's one that many people have, but if you've had enough of that fear or phobia making you look crazy or feel out of control, let's talk. I've helped people eradicate their phobia quickly and painlessly so that they can feel safe wherever they are.
If you suffer from presentation nerves you'll know that it not only causes brain fudge but physical symptoms too. The logical part of you might know that you are capable and know your stuff but you might still feel like you're going to puke or pass out when required to step into the spotlight or speak in meetings.
Don't let the fear of freezing, drying up, or saying something stupid, ruin your life, or limit your career options. I've helped countless smart and talented people who were terrified of 'stepping up' to overcome their demons so that they could present effectively without weeks of nerves, nausea, or upset tums. I'll work with you to make this terror a thing of the past so you can do whatever you want to and be comfortable in your own skin.
Most of us have experienced anxiety at some time or other, but many people live with it day-in, day-out. I think we'd probably all agree that anxiety sucks and serves no useful purpose. It can shrink your world and drain the pleasure out of the present; this is because your head is in the future, fretting about the what-ifs... the things could possibly happen, but probably won't! Anxiety impacts on your sleep, your immune system, your sex life, and your ability to have fun.
Working with clients who want to be free of the what-ifs and to live in the moment is something I really enjoy. It's great to see them learn new ways of handling situations and people and I'd love to teach you too.
When people think of trauma or PTSD, they think of the military, victims of violence, or witnesses to tragic events. The reality is that trauma is far more far-reaching than this and those who have experienced trauma often keep their distress to themselves. Unprocessed trauma can lead to unhelpful coping strategies, depression, and self-harm (in all its forms). Thankfully, new and powerful techniques and therapies are now available that allow traumatic events to be processed without re-traumatising the individual. The sharing of painful or embarrassing details is often unnecessary using these modern techniques.
Without suppressing or denying their past experiences, I help clients to process their trauma so that the distressing 'sting' is taken out of the memory allowing them to function more comfortably free from the fear of flashbacks.
If there's one thing I've seen more clients for help with than anything else, it's probably disturbed sleep. Lack of sleep increases anxiety and irritability but also reduces optimism, a desire to socialise or interest in sex, so it pretty much messes up everything. You may have had a sleep problem for a while or it may have become worse since the pandemic started. You may know that a quiet mind is a pre-requisite for sleep but how do you achieve that? If you are in the habit of thinking when you should be kipping, you may feel that you're losing the plot. Many clients I see know about good sleep hygiene but can't break the pattern of fretting or overthinking.
I work with clients to break their pattern of poor sleep, fretting about sleep, and trying too hard to sleep so that they can switch off, sleep better, and feel human again.
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